Dear Biggest Mistake Of My Life,

You know, you really ruined my life, in several aspects. You represented all the temptation and evil in the world, the taboo. And I ate you up like a dieter eats ice cream. Through all the obnoxious arrogance and contrived words you spewed every time we talked, you sure made an impression on me. In layman's terms: you're a dick.

But, despite all the terrible memories I have with you, I do have more than one really great memory. I laughed a lot when we were together, and you were the biggest life lesson I could ever asked for. You showed me what NOT to do, and in some weird way, I thank you for that. If I think back to the countless inside jokes we had, or the freedom I felt when we went on that road trip, I hate to admit it, but I smile. Amongst all the terrible events and poor judgment, there were moments when you did make me happy, even if just for that moment.

I think you're a truly misguided person. Either that, or you really are evil, which I doubt. I think you don' t know what you can and can't do to a person, and that's not okay, but it doesn't make me hate you. What I do hate is how long it took me to get over you. Trust me, it took way too long to stop getting butterflies whenever we talked.

Basically what I'm saying is this: It's easy to look back at all the bad that you caused (and continue to cause) but when I do think back to the fun we managed to have, it makes me happy.

You're a jerk, and I'd like you to fuck off.
But I hope you fuck off to find a nice (monogamous and legal) relationship with someone you can 100% care about.
I think you could make that person really happy.